We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize