Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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