garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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