I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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