I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
