apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize