Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
