I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize