SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
