They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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