Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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