I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
