thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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