I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
