So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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