Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
