I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
