we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
