She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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