was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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