Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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