I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize