Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
