google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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