Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Randomize