Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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