Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize