I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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