THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
