he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
