I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
