I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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