Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
