we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
