i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
