I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
