If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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