i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
