Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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