This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
A bitchslap is in order.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize