And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
