we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize