Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Randomize