you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize