I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize