and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
