The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
