Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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