The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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