a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
